A Hard Man to Love

She clenched her fingers into a fist. “What do you want? You must want something because like I told you over the phone, I never wanted to see you again, and I don’t want anything from you. My baby and I will be fine.”

“It’s my baby, too.” He spoke quietly, but his thinned lips showed his aggravation.

“And when did you come to that conclusion?”

He didn’t answer right away. “Once I had time to think, about you, about us.”

Us. Her short nails curled into her palm, shutting down the pain of her lost dreams. She’d learned the hard way the kind of pain loving a man like Derrick could cause.

“I realized you’re not the kind of person who would try to pass off another man’s baby as mine.”

“Lucky me, more than two weeks after you insulted me, you came to the realization that I told the truth. What took you so long?”

A sorrowful look entered his eyes. Within seconds, it disappeared. “I had to bury my father.”

Eva’s fingers flew to her mouth. “Phineas?” His father was the only member of his family she’d ever met. She’d met him once when she visited Derrick in Atlanta. He’d told her how Phineas had adopted him and raised him as his own after he married his mother, a woman thirty years younger than him. “I’m sorry.” The mumbled words seemed inadequate, especially when she wanted to reach out and put her arms around him in a comforting gesture.

He would never accept it anyway. In fact, the day after he’d told her the whole sordid story about Phineas, his mother, and his biological father, she tried to broach the subject again. He’d shut her down swiftly, letting her know the topic was off-limits, erecting the invisible walls again.

“That’s why I’m here,” Derrick continued.

Confused, Eva stared at him. “I don’t understand.”

“The past couple of weeks have been crazy since his death, but I finally feel like I’m getting my head above water. One lesson his passing has taught me is that life’s too short. I don’t want my child out there in the world, not knowing how much I want them.”

“Derrick, I would never keep the two of you apart,” Eva said in an earnest voice. “I told you as soon as I knew I was pregnant.”

Eva had thought she couldn’t have children, and coupled with irregular periods since puberty, she didn’t even suspect she was pregnant for the first three months. Only after she went to the doctor, complaining about tiredness and nausea, did she learn she was having a baby.

“Good, I’m glad to hear it. So you shouldn’t have any problem with my suggestion.” He stepped closer, eyes filled with purpose. Eva inhaled sharply, overwhelmed by his commanding presence. “I want my child to be with me at all times. I want us to get married right away.”

She gaped at him, thinking her hearing must be going bad. If she didn’t know better, she’d say he just asked her to marry him, but that would be ludicrous. A chuckle of disbelief broke past her lips, and she clamped her hand over her mouth when his face hardened.

“Did I say something funny?”

“I’m sorry, I could have sworn you asked me to marry you—sort of.”

“I did.” His solemn expression swiped the smile from her face.

“You—you can’t be serious. People don’t get married nowadays because they’re having a baby.”

“In case you didn’t notice, I’m not ‘people.’ No kid of mine is going to grow up without knowing me.”

“I agree, but I don’t see why we have to get married to ensure it.”

“Because I’m not satisfied with occasional visits. I want my son or daughter in my house, and I want to see them every day—not when it’s convenient for you.”

Eva stepped back, putting her hands up in a defensive motion against him. “Wait a minute. You’re serious about this?”

“I’ve had plenty of time to think, and it could work.”

“No, it can’t!” She swallowed to calm her frayed nerves. She sounded hysterical, while he remained as cool as a tall glass of iced tea. Before she would have welcomed a proposal—such that it was—but a wedding because of her pregnancy was the last option she’d ever considered.

Lowering her voice, she said, “We don’t have to get married. Besides, we don’t even—” She stopped, finding it difficult to say the words, but managing to muddle through. “We don’t love each other. We were already broken up when I told you I was pregnant. I don’t want to marry you, and you don’t want to marry me. Having a baby is not a good enough reason.” She took a deep breath and gradually released it. “We need to come to another arrangement.”

“All right,” he said, which only unsettled her nerves even more. She had a feeling she wouldn’t like his next words. “Then would you be willing to let me have the baby after it’s born?”

Her eyes widened, and she recoiled from him. “You really are insane, aren’t you?”

“What’s so insane about a man wanting his child?”

“Nothing, but—”

“Let me guess, a father’s not as important as a mother, right?”

“I never said that. I know how you feel because I never knew my father, either.” A common thread between the two of them, but whereas she’d seen it as a pain they could share, he never wanted to discuss it. “But a child needs its mother.”

“And its father.”

His implacable expression worried her, and she tried to mollify him. “And you’ll have all the access you want.”

“I don’t want access.”

“Well, if you think I’m going to hand my daughter over to you after she’s born, you are sadly mistaken.”

He froze, staring at her. “Daughter? You know for sure it’s a girl?”

Eva paused and nodded. “Yes. This week I found out I’m having a girl.” She’d chosen to get a 3-D ultrasound done to determine the gender of the baby.

His gaze lowered to her stomach. “A girl.”

He seemed stunned, as if hearing the sex of the baby really brought home the fact that a life was growing inside her. He ran his hand down the back of his head, across the black silk of his hair—hair she’d lovingly caressed with her own fingertips. She could almost feel the texture of it.

Eva’s voice gentled. “Derrick, I know why you’re saying these things, but you never have to worry about me cutting you out of your daughter’s life. She’ll know you love her. The relationship you didn’t have with your biological father has no bearing on your relationship with our daughter.”

He lifted his cool gaze to her face. “How much?” He pulled out his phone.

She frowned. “How much what?”

“How much will it take for you to give her up once she’s born? I can be very generous. I have my accountant on speed dial, and with one phone call, I can have any dollar amount you request transferred into the account you choose within minutes.”

He couldn’t be serious. “Wait, what?” Eva shook her head in confusion. “Did I hear you correctly? Did you just offer to buy my baby?”